Gordon Brittas Computer Sporting Fun
by Gordon Brittas

Since my first set of pages, I'm pleased to say I've been allowed some extra space by the House of Clay and my good friend Brian to continue my helping those that can not help themselves, no Colin I don't mean you. Well enough said please read on. Julie do you not have to type everything I say.

Helen suggested I should take up a hobby outside of work. I must admit this is a good idea. Helen has her Woodworking classes. She often comes home totally exhausted saying how good a rub down she's had with her instructor, Paul. I'm not sure how good a teacher Paul actually is, as Helen has now been rubbing down the same table top for over three weeks. Anyway back to the matter in hand. I thought long and hard and decided after doing my first Web page to buy a computer as Brian didn't seem very happy parting with his while I did my last one. Helen I'm pleased to say encourged this and even helped in here own way by decorating the study and advised me that I may need to spend a lot of time of my own learning how to use it. She's so caring.

I was quite amazed at the range of machines available. After much reading on the importance of Hard disk size and the amount of Cache needed for various programs I decided to seek proper advice. Now I have been on several computer courses but have yet to do one on micro electronics or system administration. So it was about time I found out about it all. I took it upon myself to use one of the local stores in Whitbury itself. I like to do my shopping local. I think it shows their Leisure centre manager cares for the community by supporiting local shops and events. Although I don't go back to the Whitbury Pet Shop, the police are still looking into this matter. I was served by a nice young chap, though not altogether that bright did show promise by the time I'd finished with him.

Making a sale is much like running a Sports and Leisure centre. Your customer may come to the centre for a spot of swimming, but, you know they really want table tennis and a bit of badminton, but they are just afraid to ask. it doesn't matter that they'd got a hip problem, it's the taking part that counts. This is where somebody like myself comes in. I am a expert who is able guide people into what they don't know they actually want. These decisions have to be taken by the qualified, the less qualified can cause the injury and often fatality. but, as long as that's below three a year, it's below the acceptable statistic. If you divide it over five years the figures also tend to look better. I was afraid Colin had overstepped this limit when he suggested to the over sixty's bowls team they should stop their game and try something a bit different, like Pole Vaulting. Laura managed to stop him by using the Fire Alarm, which actually turned out to be a real fire. Funny how things work out like that, if it hadn't been a real fire I would have had to caution her about the procedure of the use of an alarm.

Helen joined me in the shop as I had completed the deal for some additional software and a five year warranty and upgrade plans. Helen for some reason seemed convinced it was just to get rid of me. Little does she know about my management bargaining powers. I explained to her how it's my unstanding and nothing else that managed to get almost 50% off the stated price.

I believe a manual should be read thoroughly, except that is for manufactors of computer manuals. Why they have to twist and distaut the facts I will never know. So, after reading the enclosed manuals I set about my registration card and comments. It was almost a week later I got round to switching my new machine on. I had not wasted the time. I'd been writing a full addition to their documentation for the company to include in future releases. I realise with my additions the manual would be close to four times its current size, but we want a complete guide for the new user. So I think my fifty page index for instance goes some way to doing that.

I installed several pieces of software to my machine which included various sporting games and a guide to leisure. I was amazed that the sporting games involved only a small amount of joystick wiggling, not much fun in that. A brisk walk, now that's the ticket, get out there and use your body. The only parts of your body used on that game was one hand shaking your joystick. What fun people get out of that I will never know. The guide to leisure a book of sport it says, not so much a book rather a DVD, only a small point I know, but, it's best to get things right first time. I shall be pointing this out to the publishers. The DVD was very good a huge database of the information for the Sporting and Non Sporting Public. This was produced by somebody with the Dream, somebody who wants to bring people together off the streets away from wars and destruction and into a game of Table Tennis. This way they could settle their differences and get themselves fit in a best out of five.

I think I'll keep computers for computing and keep games and sports as they should be. Helen on the other hand enjoys the odd game. She often plays Quake 3 or Unreal whatever they are. She says it releases a lot of tension, a good run round the block does the same for me. I took a quick look at what she was doing and she has had somebody change all the 'skins' to look like me. I think seeing me while playing must help in calming her down, how very touching. I must go, a leisure centre does not run itself and besides Laura is away and Colin is in charge..


Many thanks for the BBC and Fegen and Norriss for the Great program "The Brittas Empire" and to Jonathan Rice for the Book Gordon Brittas "Sharing the Dream" available from Boxtree for 6.99 uk Pounds ISBN 0-7522-0896-9. Also massive thanks to Chris Barrie for his amazing character in the series and on the Audio Tape of "Sharing the Dream" that inspired me to put together this whole Brittas Web Site and start the Chris Barrie Fans Site.